Taking Chances.

Do we automatically go into a relationship looking to fall in love? Or do some of us just see how it goes?

Well, what happens when it starts to fall apart and you’re no longer the ‘loving’ couple that you used to be? We get back up, after a few tubs of ice cream or whatever, and try to ‘fall’ again. Why do we do this to ourselves?

By the time trust has been established, you’ve already invested a lot of time and heart into this relationship. Yet, the probability is it’s just going to waste because not many things last anymore.

Ok, I’m being a bit cynical  To be fair love is the best feeling, nothing else matters and your just in this happy little ‘honeymoon’ bubble. Well guess that bubble always has to pop… which isn’t always a bad thing… not always.

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Another Night To Say Goodbye.

Going out tonight with two of my friends I’ve known since year 7. One of them I used to be so close with. I love them both. I know I’ve got more people to say goodbye to but this is a girl I thought I was in love with for 2 years, we had some weird friendship, never talked about anything serious – that was the deal. Until last weekend, she actually told me her opinion and the truth. But tonight we’re just going to get drunk (well for me tipsy) and the bus ride home should be interesting 🙂

Next week I’m taking one of my straight friends (who used to be homophobic) to a gay bar. Should be interesting how many butches try to take her home.

We’ve all said goodbye to eachother twice before at parties and stuff and it got a little emotional (one of our friends wrote us all thank you cards!) but now this weekend two are leaving and it is the final time. Next weekend more people move so really need to hurry up and say goodbye. Not allowed to get emotional!

Just a growing-up process, have to move on.

Sitting there in my old school sixth form with my friend made us realise that nothing is going to stay the same. The school is being rebuilt to a ‘better’ standard. Though, I don’t think ‘better’ means to make it look more like a hospital and less like the school we all went to for 7 years. So, we took pictures, had some coffee, basically just trying to relive the last 2 years of A-level. But all the things we used to talk about are irrelevant. Things have changed. Almost everyone is moving off to different universities, we all have to face the fact that we’re probably not going to see most of our friends again. We had fun. We Re-lived it a little. But that will probably be the last time we will ever feel ‘on top’ of the student food chain (until we get our degrees i suppose). Best time of my life was with my friends there and it’s hard to let go of.

Guess it’s time to start all over again.

Change

There’s No Place Like Home

… or the smell of your mother’s cooking!

Living with my girlfriend and away from home, can’t believe that I’m kinda homesick!

When your mum is waiting at the door for you, you know that you’ve been missed (and it’s only been around 3 days!) and then the comforting smell of weird, but delicious, concoctions of food that your mum has effortlessly ‘slung togethe’r, just for you. It’s just the beginning of the ‘welcome home.’

You’re back and it’s like nothing has happened. You settle back into the same routine (with an added bit of politeness instead of the ‘in a minute excuse’) Even your dad goes back to sleep – thanks alot. So, with your dad asleep you gossip with your mum and listen, with interest, to all the day-to-day rubbish that you used to ignore and get annoyed about. That’s when you realise it. The amount you take your mum for granted; she loves you unconditionally, cooks , cleans (yes nags about it but I wouldn’t want to constantly wash my dads socks and boxers!)

Even though I love my girlfriend, I still miss it back at home chatting with my mum and watching weird TV programmes like Hairy Bikers (it’s quite alright to be fair) but I guess it’s just part of moving on, something everyone has to do eventually.

Dumber and Dumber

I don’t know whether it’s due to the six weeks holiday (though mine started in late June and is still going till October) or because it’s a completely new league but these books I have to read are just making me feel so thick.Constantly having to look up words is not doing my confidence any good. So, after looking up a word I decide to do little drawings to help explain it to myself, good job my lecturers wont have to see my notes!

Does anyone else ever feel like this when they start a new year of something? A job, GCSE, A-Levels or uni?

But I guess it’s just time to crack open my book again and try to understand it! *determined*

“Education is our passport to the future, for tomorrow belongs to the people who prepare for it today.”

The Future. Why is it so scary? Is it because you don’t know what is going to happen? Is it because you think you can’t fulfil the expectations you had before? Or, and here’s probably the one that you don’t want to admit to yourself, you’re scared of letting go to the things and people that you love and make you feel comfortable because you think that if you move on that’s it, it’s all over. You want to stay comfortable because let’s face it, it’s the easiest option! But who ever said easier was any better? Letting go may be the hardest thing you’ll ever do but it may be the best. It’s just hard to let go of the things you love in order to move on and get the best out of life that you can.

Education. They put such a massive emphasis on this that we believe that it is the only goal in life. I’m not saying it’s not important (hey, I’m going to uni to get a degree and then become a teacher) but there are other things to life and people are successful without it. They say that ‘education is vital. It maps out and sets your future’ Well, what if I don’t want it to be set? What if I want to do something else? Isn’t it so annoying when people tell you that you’re going to be great at this and eventually do that! We’re human, we’re designed to be a bit indecisive! This is why I don’t want to Prepare. It leads onto the future which you can’t be prepared for because it’s unpredictable!! So why not enjoy the moments you have and wait for the future to knock at the door, it’ll come soon enough.